I love black thongs
He's married, but his wife isn't my neighbor so I don't feel bad about coveting him.
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
I sold 10 pepperonis for 5 dollars last night....i fucking love drunk people
Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..
Ok...drunk girls at the bar are charging $1 for motorboating. It's fucking WEDNESDAY. I never want to leave.
Been at work for four hours and just discovered the chairs in my office double as a napping surface. Most productive thing I've done all day
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
I threw up in the darkest corner of the bar last night, then watched 2 girls freak out in disgust after walking through it. I then realised I puked on the dancefloor, took a picture and proceeded to send it to my mom.
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
Car is still out of commission. Looks like it's Grape Nuts and scotch for dinner.
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
I don’t mind that he’s uncircumcised. It’s the fact that he talks about the Bible immediately after we have sex .
What did you do with the dog when you went into the club?
coat checked
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