What a tease, dude. She's giving me emotional blue balls.
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
I guess you don't realize how much twelve bags of chips are, until they're all over your floor.
Suuuuuuper drunk and just sang fuck her gently to the chiminea. I'm in bad shape.
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
i'm half naked talking to a cat. you don't have to justify your life to me.
You woke me up at 2 am to tell me I could pee in a golf club if I wanted to.
I mean, the sex was awesome last weekend, but I didn't even imagine I'd reached ovarian rupture status.
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
He lit a shoe on fire and tried putting it out by peeing on it
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
Randomize
