come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
I'll be waiting for you under the stairs with peanut butter and tequila ... Don't tell the neighbors
She said she had a thing for dinosaurs. Come get me now
Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
I understand why you refuse to be sober now
i was calling myself "cat the lion" and tried eating the computer mouse because i thought it was "my prey"
I didnt realize we were having a competition in poor decision making skills
how else could I explain the last few years
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
This dude is being a total douche
Just because it's Christmas Eve does not mean the liquor store has to give you a free bottle of peppermint schnapps
P.S. It's common courtesy to let the girl your banging know if she's about to walk into the same place your girlfriend is at so she can get her poker face ready
YOU'RE CHANGING THE SUBJECT. I CAN BLOW SOMETHING UP OR I CAN TELL HIM YOU LOVE HIM, BUT ONE OF THE TWO IS BOUND TO HAPPEN
if i had known the extra weight would have gone to my tits, i would have started drinking years ago
Seriously I'm not after your cock. It's a nice bonus, like finding $20 in the dryer, but not the reason I hang out with you.
I really need to stop sending pussy pics if I'm going to be running for state representative in November
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
Randomize