I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
he put on The Eye of the Tiger while she was in labor.
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
My mail consisted of a box of dildos and christmas card from grandma.
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
Oh my god please beg your father to turn the car around so you can possibly get laid by a knight at medieval times.
i saw the poster for your lost tequila... what a shame
Embrace your curves. Cuz we're too poor for a coke habit.
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
He just made my one night stand pancakes for breakfast. And I thought living with my ex was going to be weird.
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
I made out with a 40 year old and told her we were dating then got kicked out of a gay bar. This is the day I stop drinking.
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