I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
btw ... thanks for not giving me up as the craigslist killer
i owe you one
thanks for snagging those panties for me
I'm eating oreos and watching porn. This is your fault.
Talk about awkward... Just went to dinner with my mother and realized I fucked our waiter the night before. She HAD to see the looks he was giving me!
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
No it'll be my boobs and the luge part will be from my nipples. Everyone will be sucking beer from my perfectly sculpted and partially melted tits.
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
All I'm wearing right now is a condom and a sock.
Just one?
Yup. One sock.
I threw up in the middle of a bar last night and still managed to get laid! Happy thanksgiving!
I may or may not have puked near a bear on the side of the road this morning.
Randomize
