I am so fucking pissed, there are no Shamwows in the As Seen on TV Store.
Looks like you'll have to stick to jizzing in socks.
I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
WISH UPON A TAMPON
They constantly get farther than me.
tampons.
just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :)
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
My uncrustable is thawing in my straightener
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
This guy keeps going off in the metal detector. When is it appropriate for me to punch him in the throat just in case?
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
I need to pay that drinking in public ticket, but I also really want to get a spray tan next week... so priorities.
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
Randomize
