your parents love me but you hate me
hey im gonna send you a picture of my dinner
if its a picture of your dick again we are no longer friends
I think I am morally bankrupt
girl next to me is signing up for tough love. definitely getting laid.
and if it starts getting weird im just going to tell him i used to be a man
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
He told everyone he was going inside...an hour later we get a knock on the garage door from some dude telling us a guy is passed out on the lawn and we should get him inside because it's about to rain
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
I got punched in the face by a Cowboy last night. Then he bought me a beer cause o convinced security not to kick him out the bar. Start of a fairytale love story? I think so.
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
I fought off a bull with my bare hands while he went off to have sex with her against a wall. I’m more upset about the fact that no one is acknowledging what I did.
Randomize
