k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
Whatcha textin bout Willis?
Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
Apparently on the way out of the ER i asked the nurse to doggie-bag me some more morphine.
We're too lazy to do dishes, so we're making sangria in a flower vase.
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
I forgot that I thought it would be a good idea to hairspray my toilet seat last night after I took 12 shots of vodka so when I just went to pee, I stuck to the toilet. Never drinking again.
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
I need to find out this kids work schedule. I need mustache rides on my lunchbreaks.
I apologized to him for my lack of boobs after he felt me up
How's my sex life is me mastubating next to her dog. that's how it's going.
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
Randomize
