I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
just ran into a kid I used to hook up with while wearing his shirt. Only me. I tried to pretend like it wasn't his but it said his name on the back so I wasn't winning that.
his grandma walked in on us. twice. and he was truly fucking surprised when i put my pants back on.
You're going to have to buy me a lot of drinks before the bee suit goes on...
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
I was expecting a blowjob when she shoved me in the bathroom but instead she shaved my pubes into a mustache for my penis. I am still satisfied.
I know you're on vacation but you should know I just walk of shamed through a hotel lobby while leaving a threesome on Friday the 13th. Fuck superstition, I win.
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
I just got a job offer for Australia. Unfortunately I have given the name of Whitney
I think Jabba the Hut is dying in the stall next to me.
Getting a blow job while breaking up with my gf helps cope with the pain... Kinda weird her best friend is giving me the BJ
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
I literally JUST MADE IT to the liquor store. I bought a box of wine with the lights off
Well now you know not to take drugs from your friends. Take it from stangers. They're more reliable.
Who was that dick in the suit telling us to stop drinking?
The priest.
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