ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
i told my doctor i had 3 partners and one unprotected.. shes a cute little indian lady i couldnt break her heart
i celebrated the independence of our country by dry heaving tequila all morning. so classy. happy 4th.
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
I was going through my paperwork and I found the lifetime warranty card for my 14" dildo. I saved it. You know, just in case.
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
Dear future Eric, sorry about the Everclear. Sincerely, Eric +2 shots E.C.
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
Seriously. Texted me 4 times and that didn't wake me up so he nicely called and left a voicemail saying he WOULD call me 8 times. So when he called back I answered.
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
I just fist bumped God in my head for last night. What a bro.
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
You told me you didn't want to go to the hospital because you were drunk, but because you didn't want to leave the "fun".
Randomize
