There's a dildo in the cheerios box here...
He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
Either he was jacking off or having a seizure next to me in bed. Either way, I was too lazy to help.
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
You'd be proud of me. They tried to give me bread to sober up, but I told them no, im on a diet.
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
i think I'm just gonna buy a new vibrator, body pillow, some guys cologne to spray on it, a life time supply of wine and weed and be done with all this shit
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
I'm so incredibly high right now the fact I am texting is nothing short of miraculous. Call the Pope. Hell make me Saint Roy, patron of stoners.
My previously white toilet seat is now hot pink. I'm not sure why or how but I know it's your fault.
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
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