I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
so apparently mom and dad slept together on the first date
i guess it runs in the family.
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
At least I know she didn't hear me crawl to my room. Or did I walk on my hands? Fuck if I know.
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
How many strippers in the world do you think have had a debate with someone about the NRA?
I'm not drunk because I think my blood just is alcohol from last night so being drunk is sober. If that makes sense
Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties.
I'm out of milk so I'm dunking my Oreos in Bailey's; this is my life now.
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
Randomize