Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
when i was 16 reading the aftercare instructions at the piercing place i wondered why they would ever think to warn me about getting semen in my bellybutton
then i met college
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
After skinny dipping in your pond, I think me and tequila have added a whole new dynamic to our relationship.
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
I just had a flash of me drinking straight vodka out of a condom...
Accidentally peeing a little on the couch in the middle of a sneeze is way different from railing a random on our waffle counter. I am the better roommate.
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
At this point, just throw that mattresses away. Or bronze it and display it as a testament to your shame. either is good.
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
He nailed that bed down really well so it won't break again. All I could think while he was nailing it was "challenge accepted".
Verdict: uncircumcised.
Randomize
