Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
So Jesus turned water into wine. So what? I once turned a whole student loan into natty light. Your move holy man.
My mom just told me to drench my entire body in vodka for 20 minutes. I have never been this russian. no one has ever been this russian
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
there is nothing like a happy birthday present when you wake up with a bow on your vagina.
so the x-ray technician didnt buy my story of falling off a curb. she said a fall of that height couldnt snap the bone that way. bitch called me a drunken idiot too. if she wasnt so hot i'd be angry
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
As if finding out the man you just had sex with is married isn't bad enough, it gets so much more awkward when his wife comes in to comfort you...
I just realized that at some point last night I told someone I would only be friends with 16% of them because the other 84% stole my people's land
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
Your "dubstep at ceilis" resulted in a random naked guy busting into my room and peeing all over my bathroom
You think that was bad? One time my parents found my sister half naked on top of the four runner in the garage. She makes me look like the good child.
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