It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
I've never been 12-exclamation-point-excited for sex. That must have been good.
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
I just found a beer pong ball in my mail box. I think its a sign
Theres two guys using a blow up doll to hold their beers while they float around the pool
Im on my way, tell them to get ready for a high-five
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
She was eating whipped cream out of a plunger at 3 am in the morning. Yet somehow she still had an elegance about her.
We're 17 hours into a 3 day weekend, and he's already shitfaced. He fell of the dock TWICE and insisted on wearing a life jacket on dry land.
I just power smoked 3 bongs, ate hot cocoa mix before making hot cocoa, and realized James Spader's character on The Office reminds me of your mom.
Doors open. I'm laying in bed watching caddy shack and drinking a vodka tonic.
And I'm out of vodka so bring vodka or 2013 will blow ass
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
Boobs are out for the taking
You were petting a 40 year old man's moustache for 15 minutes
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
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