The best thing happened. Some guy was butchering Conway Twitty at karoke and the power went off in the whole bar. And someone shouted "you pissed jesus off when you messed with conway!"
I cannot believe you needed a note to remind yourself to ask me about the fourteen sleeping Mexicans.
Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
he told my vagina that he was looking forward to meet it
Highlight of the day: realizing the man in the car next to mine was getting road head... at 2:45pm... nicely done sir, nicely done.
I fed the cats at 7 am, made her eggs, gave her oral, and now I'm helping her clean and baking her brownies. Cosmos got nothing on me.
Just saw a cop give four blondes gas for their car on their way to Vegas. They seriously ran out of gas and called 911 about it. Its like a porno plot.
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
I'm adopting to save the world from the moral outrage that would be my offspring
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
I know her cup size but not her name....
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
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