At some point last night I thought pissing in a bottle was an awesome idea when I woke up a little piss was actually in the bottle a lot was on my TV remote
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
Naturally, I just peed all over the floor. Two guys in front of me looked at me, but i just shrugged. They won't remember either.
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
The world is my kaleidiscope. I see whatever the alcohol wants me to.
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
Guess who just made out with Sloth from The Goonies!
I wish drunk me came with subtitles
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
You're supposed to discourage my sluttiness not bring me hot Colombian men
hypothetically, what's the best method to remove an stray semen gob from a roommate's important school document?
I pointed at him and said “there goes mr fuckwad”
Randomize
