A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
For the sake of being nice I congratulated her and she replied with something along the lines of that I need to stay away from him and not touch him ever. I really wanted to be like "been there, done that" but my New Years resolution was to not start any cat fight over boys with small dicks before noon
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
Why does my nose taste spicy?
How do you know what your nose tastes like?
I just woke up in his bed.. in a cardboard castle, with a Justin Bieber poster on the ceiling staring down at me, cuddling with 4 empty PBR cans. I win.
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
Randomize