That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
I'm glad I have good healthy relationships with my one night stands
I'm sorry. I really don't see what's wrong with pregaming before a wine tasting.This champagne won't drink itself.
The wine tasting is just for charity anyways...
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
It takes a special kind of Adderall to make me go to the hardware store, buy paint, and paint tiny polka-dots on all four of my bedroom walls.
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
I just puked in my courtyard and dripped toothpaste in my chest hair. You better be getting laid or this drunk is wasted.
Cleaned the whole house at 7:30 and after cleaning the bathroom I think I had cocaine on my sweatpants
Taking dicks and breaking hearts, no better life
Bottom line; if I'm coming out of my bat cave to do the dishes and get a chicken wing and I have no pants or makeup on and my messy bun looks more like Santa got leprosy and crashed his sled into the back of my head then let me be. That's all I'm saying.
I'm sitting at my kitchen table alone dressed as a dinosaur smoking bowls in the dark. Is this rock bottom? Or is this living the dream? Who's to say
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
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