Whats the opposite of morning wood? Whatever its called, everyone saw it when it fell out.
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
Actually, what with the curvature of the Earth, it's faster to leave from Washington. And Google maps recommends kayaking instead of swimming.
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
In other news, people don't judge you when you buy a vibrator if you buy a funny birthday card and bag with it. I learned that this weekend.
If someone made a breakfast cereal that was a cross between lucky charms and fruity pebbles and called it unicorn power with a huge fucking rainbow and a unicorn standing in a pot of gold on the box, they would be rich. Not only monetarily but spiritually as well...
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
After we'd both come, we started writing a book about dragons. Woke up this morning to a full English breakfast. Can't thank you enough for introducing us
Listen, you eat the donut. I eat you out. Everybody wins.
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