WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
i called my mom using *69 and said this was the principal and Matt has a snow a day today. she believed me.
hungover + watching bobsledding = i just puked
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
I partied with a deaf mute last night. strangely enough the more drunk I get the easier it is to understand him.
He said I was really mad at him on Friday. Dude I fell asleep in all my clothes and shoes, with my flashlight on, on my phone... I could have been mad at the wall. It wasn't my classiest day.
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
It was inevitable. It was like I was a caterpillar and now I'm a drunk and high butterfly
Me and mom just bonded over our mutual desire to bang Mark Ruffalo. I'm not sure how to feel about this.
It was great. Except he kept asking me to lick his butthole, I was like firm no
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
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