Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
It's never too late to be topless.
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
I used to put Bugles on my penis and pretend it was a wizard.
He told me he loved me. I didn't know what to say so i just squirted the baby oil at him
She could makes a perfectt roast dinner drunk but she nearly sets the kitchen alight microwaving popcorn.
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
Are you serious?! She sent a pizza instead of showing up?!
She did indeed. Papa Johns. It helped because I was super hangry. That bitch is smart!
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
Only I could dislocate my ribcage coaching volleyball and still want to get drunk tonight.
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