last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
I want to let you in on my two latest life goals. Have a photograph of me squirting whipped cream into a midget's mouth, and have sex on a roof.
Just made a beer run. At 9am. In my pjs. I should not be graduating today
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
You still owe me a blowjob for knowing more about hurricanes than you.
I know you just got bad medical news... But want some moonshine?
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
I never thought I'd end up with a prison pen pal through tinder
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