so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
dude all you wanted to do was sleep under a bridge
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
Remind me to tell you a really funny story about me and arson.
I think I'm just gonna be a cat and wear slutty black clothes with some eyeliner on my face and pretend my ears got stolen by a drunk guy
Drinking Hot Toddies on the Porch and blasting bob dylans "hurricane" bring it on sandy!
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
Yea it's also hard to turn down a man asking you out with a chicken sandwich.
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
He has a beach house and a Simba tattoo. Our wedding is next Tuesday, hope you're free.
If he thinks I'm canceling my orgy to coddle his stupid fucking behavior, he has another thing coming
Randomize