So we've decided on 'hamburger' as your code for tonight. If you add ketchup or fries, we know the threat level has escalated.
Words of wisdom-never eat a peanut-butter covered banana on a construction site ever again
Planet Earth isn't gonna get stoned and watch itself.
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
No you usually just ranted about the voicemail bitch until she cut you off again
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
Inebriation Olympics: Team Drunk vs Team Stoned. This weekend. It's on.
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
I'm gonna play this game called Conquer the Dicks. I think it is self explanatory.
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
There's a dryer on fire at the laundromat, and everyone's just standing around taking pictures. Except me. I'm texting.
Something like, "Merry Christmas. I hope Santa shits in your mouth."?
Randomize
