How come it tastes like onions whenever I go down on her?
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
We were busted for public indecency in the back of my car in the parking lot. This time we were just reading my Cosmo magazine.
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
all nice guys are gay and all hot ones are assholes
You're fat. Stop making excuses
I don't appreciate you drunk dressing passed-out me in spandex for bed
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
I totally just potholed and almost crashed while trying to lick salsa off my boob.
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
Someone explain to me why I woke up to find a stolen shopping cart in my room...
I couldnt face her after that wonderful, terrible blowjob. Made a rope out of towels and climbed out her bathroom window.
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