i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
All I've ever wanted to do in life is right
Maybe you should learn how to spell write first
Banjos are just sex machines. Like lights to moths, banjos are to hipster bitches.
drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
He just made his dick say "woof" and howl at me. can you pick me up?
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
I'm high and craving hash browns from McDonalds. Please pick me up. I also would like a hug and a supportive pat on the back when you get here. Thanks.
Its two in the afternoon. McDonalds don't sell hash browns at 2 in the afternoon. Whore. The hug I can provide however.
You stuck a chicken finger in that stripper's clevage and said "Keep this warm for me.
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
hooked up with someone last night while wearing walrus pajama pants. clearly I'm accomplishing big things in life
He wrote on the bartenders notepad "phone?" So I wrote back "911"
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
Hey I had a great night last night but I don't want to lie to you I'm only 19 and that wasn't my place its was my cousin he's gone for the summer and I was just house sitting and watching his cat I'm sorry
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
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