Ambien. No doubt about it.
drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
Whenever I'm hungover I try to stay in public as much as possible, hoping to be a cautionary tale to children. It's a public service, really.
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
Idk what the interview would be like but I imagine you in a suit and tie surveying a nervous freshman and eventually leading him into a labyrinth of debauchery and clapping him on the back, saying "welcome to the fraternity, son"
YO CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR MÉNAGE À TROIS. YOU GO, GLENN COCO
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
The highlight of the trip was definitely my dad telling me that I "used to be his prettiest daughter."
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
Randomize
