Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
He was eating me out on the dryer...and his mom walked in with her laundry basket...
He wasn't the only one with a full load.
How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
Roommate is high and swore off off the diet. Said she wants to make everyone else fat since it'd be easier. She spent today baking 3 dozen brownies for the office tomorrow and is already down to 24.
My life is literally the worst. I was just laughing so hard at how hot they looked feeding each other the brownies and then I was like DON'T CRY
He has silky zebra print sheets, which you would think he put on just for me, but the bed was unmade. Did I just sleep with a closet case??
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
THIS THING HATES MY LIVER
All I've done today is nap, eat candy and get off from my vibrator. I didn't know it was possible to be THIS single.
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
Randomize