The worst part was when my mom got more drunk than anyone else and started doing the Time Warp.
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip
you're just mad cause i madeout with you while having a mouth full of chewed pretzels
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
I swear to god little potato creatures live inside Belvedere bottles and claw at your throat as you swallow shots.
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
The amount of effort it's taking me to not shit my pants this morning is probably a sign to slow down the drinking
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
The housekeeper found my huge dildo under the bathroom sink, and another in the living room. I can't get much more single than this.
I just split a tacobell party box with my boss. 12 tacos. We were equals for a moment.
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