never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
Either I need to stop bringing you back to my apt or I need to stop buying ikea furniture
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
I'm already too high to be publicly presentable. I just looked at myself in the mirror without my sunglasses. Debated contacts. Said aloud "But I'm nothing without my sunglasses."
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
I wish I got like a congrats basket for being a responsible sexually active member of society complete with condoms, tissues and lollipops.
I swear you won't find cereal in your washer machine again.
Weird thing is that's not the first time I've been felt up by a Santa. Happens every year
He tried to buy me a drink at dollar beer night. All 3 of his credit cards were declined, so he asked me if I could cover it. Needless to say, I'm not calling him back.
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
OF COURSE I NEED TO KNOW I MUST KNOW EVERYTHING
YOU ARE NOT OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I AM OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
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