are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
She insisted on cleaning her room in the dark. 5 minutes in, she forgot what she was doing and started putting shirts on instead of hanging them up.
A blind man just put his face in my cleavage. I'm also crying.
What does it say about my expectations if I'm pounding three beers the hour before a date?
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
well, shes hot as hell, but she does keep saying she's the president of the loch ness monster's fan club, so that's kinda a red flag...
I just found out how I got home last night. The bartenders found me sitting in the brush peeing and called me a cab. Have you seen my underwear?
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