Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
I puked while I was brushing my teeth this morning and had to get a new tbrush
Ew, did you brush them again?
Yeah but i puked on the new one and decided to give up...failure
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
I'm in my boyfriends bathroom and I shit so bad, there was no toilet paper but his mom's clothes were on the floor and I wiped my butt on her underwear... now it looks like she sharted
yeah, and then after the convo was clearly over, my dad decides to scream "SIZE MATTERS" just to make things even more uncomfortable.
I just can't bring boyfriends home.
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
If this nail lady pinches my achilles one more time im kicking her directly in her bedazzled boobs
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
I think I'm destined to be the stoner version of one of those successful but emotionally unavailable characters Sandra Bullock always plays in movies
...Just this whole adulting thing gets in the way of mermaid drag shows at lesbian bars.
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
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