.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
True Life: I puke at bars and try to catch it in my hand...then walk away like it didn't happen
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
My stomach literally has no contents left. Tequila cleanse=success.
FUCK... Pulled a chick from the bar went to her house passed out on the shitter. She lives in a house full of girls. They were making poop jokes as i left
Highlight of the weekend: getting roundhouse kicked in the dick while switching from reverse cowgirl.
You got Broadway Drunk, dude. I haven't heard you sing "Music Of The Night" like that since the last time I was holding you up on the way to the subway at two in the morning.
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
I joined the mile high club last night. I ran a mile while high on coke. It was glorious
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
In case you're wondering... Yes walmart will judge you for buying vodka and pickles at 645am.
True life: I inadvertently fucked a whole friend group. More details to come tonight.
Randomize