Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
His health insurance plan WILL NOT cover Lasix surgery but it WILL cover 100% of a penis enlargment operation...
I don't know what it is about vodka that make me ruin relationships.
Slutty costumes are my most sacred holiday tradition! Wearing a not-slutty costume is like putting cheezwiz on a communion wafer.
Well you finally jumped into that tree you've always wanted into and some girl gave you an 8.5. You were very happy.
I told the DJ last night to play Third Eye Blind before 1:45 and just pointed at him as I walked away. He didn't do it and at 1:45 I just walked out pointing at him, without my friends
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
Wait I'm all alone with a guy and his turtle
I've got your keys and your panties. You can have one back. Your play honeybuns.
I love standing in line at rite aid for 10 minutes being forced to talk to my ex's mom about life while I'm holding nothing but yeast infection cream
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
I'm having to shit out rocks
The last time we went to a costume party, you walked around in a loincloth with a cross and said you were Jesus. I'm eager to see how much more offensive you can be.
Randomize