a smallpox vaccine scar is like a lower back tattoo.
Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
My main thought on the Olympics: I need LESS cowbell.
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
The guy you hooked up with is asleep in the tub. I just pee'd and he said 'turn off the tap' before snoring again.
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
I had sex while you were puking this morning and I'm sorry. Kind of.
It's ok. I had sex while you were drunk crying last night. We're even.
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
Randomize
