Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
Just think about how many life skills I lack. Cooking... Driving... Sobriety...
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
Have you seen Dave? He's not on top of the bar anymore but I found his shirt.
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
Someone wrote "gnarballz" on my fridge in black marker. I'm pissed, but more concerned I slept with the one who did it
I'm sorry I called your mother a reasonably-priced receptacle.
Mischief managed.
YOU ARE NOT A MARAUDER, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO NOW?
She did NOT find it funny to come upstairs to find me with the word "MISERY" written on my forehead in magic marker and the label to the vodka bottle replaced with a scrap of paper taped around that says "COMPANY"
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
I’m appalled by how severely I lower my standards when I’m horny & impaired
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
I’m calling dibs!
You can’t call dibs on dick. That’s free range dick. May the best vagina win!
Randomize
