My cock was attacked by outdoor plants
Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
I just caught myself watching and Irish step dance documentary in my underwear drinking nyquil through a straw at 2 in the afternoon. today's off to a good start.
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
you should never start the day with a boob text. It can only go downhill from there
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
Holy shit, we're married as fuck.
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
Why would you get kicked out?
Well, an overweight man is currently not wearing a shirt. Or pants. And is getting in touch with his inner Chippendale. You can probably fill in the blanks.
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
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