My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
I'm not sure where but someone shit somewhere in the house
I brought up my Bobbly Flay drinking game in the interview. Of course I got the job.
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
May or may not have just put tequila in my special "kids+" orange juice fortified with vitamins a, b, c, d, e, and now t.
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
You have got to be the only man who has passed out while getting a lap dance.
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
Ill try not let guys feel my boobs for free drinks next time, no promises tho. I am my boyfriends worst nightmare.
As a BFF it is your duty to answer when I drunk call you at 3 in the morning because I couldn't find a knife to cut that cake. I finally found one, fell asleep with it and the cake in bed. K thanks bye.
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