I'm drive I can fine osifer
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
You think you know everything because you're wearing a sweater
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
I don't think it's food poisoning, I think it's cause you cooked it over burning styrofoam
Getting drunk in an Applebee's pray for me
Lord god protect this child
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
Your grandma changed her Netflix password :(
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
He kept spinning my wedding ring like thanks buddy I remember
drunk me always erases text conversations because she is a woman of mystery and does not like for me to know what's going on in her life
Just landed in Atlanta. Still drunk. I can't feel my face
He asked me to describe my life outside work. I responded with "Home-wrecker.
Randomize
