They told me I spent half the night at the club with one ball hanging out my shorts. Apparently it got me 1 free drink, 2 numbers, and thrown out.
If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
He asked if I wanted to leave my bra on while we were doing it from behind bc he read somewhere that all that pounding can be painful for big breasts. THAT thoughtful.
dude she looked like Newman from Seinfeld I'm done with this wingman shit
Im walking to an ob gyn practice session right now. Literally have to get face first in a middleaged vagina in 10 min.
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
On my way to return shoes I bought so that I can afford to buy a pregnancy test. Is this adulthood?
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
i out mim tonsoeep
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