they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
you made a powerpoint titled 'things i've drank tonight' and emailed it to me.
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
Edward fifth and chaser hands
He broke into my apartment to check his Facebook again, the beer is all gone, and there's a new high score on pac man.
Now all we have to do is pretend we haven't seen each other naked. Work tomorrow is going to be FUN.
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
If you loved me you'd bring cheese fries and a condom
ok, i suppose pissing your pants could be considered a wardrobe malfunction.
He walked around my apt complex completely naked and started peeing in the maintenance because he thought it was the bathroom. So yeah, pretty drunk.
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
I had Mac n cheese made with weed butter last night. Epic
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