It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
How can I look at her with a straight face when she has dry puke on her eye lid
4 months of living in europe has taught me the art of making a drunken stumble look like a dance move
Today is definitely a "stand over the toilet and pee through the opening at the bottom of my boxers" kind of day.
I guess the silver lining is that having a big dick really comes in handy when you're hungover.
It's a mixed blessing.
Dude, seduce him with cookies. You almost turned me gay with scones. Don't be surprised when they get you laid.
Winner winner, chicken dinner. I am the sole survivor of the orgy without strep. Or maybe I was the carrier?
All i really wanna do tonight is get drunk with you and dance on tables. is that too much to ask?
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
i woke up this morning put my hand under the pillow and there was a banana there
Found like seven bruises in the shower. One was shaped like a hand. Best. Sex. Ever.
Last time I was blackout at Cowbells I was running around screaming “WHERES THE BLOOOWWWW”
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
You lost to your mom AND grandma in beer pong last night. pretty sure that constitutes a retirement from the sport
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