You really coming over, don't trick.
Todays lesson: Chew your food better when your drunk. I almost choked throwing up this morning.
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
i'm at the point now where i want him to say anything. even an apology for his boomerang-shaped penis would be nicer than no comment.
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
I haven't been "cry when you eat ben and jerrys" high in a while.
We banged through her entire lady gaga playlist. I can die happy now
just when i thought we would make it home without incident he tried to walk a police dog
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
Spotted: shirtless guy wearing cut-off hot shorts, 1 cowboy boot and a sombrero puking in a bush while his friend yelled 'stop being a bitch" from the sidewalk'. Happy 4th of July 'merica!
I just woke up to myself peeing the bed. Happy hump day! I'll never get married.
Just took a shot of 151, rimmned my middle finger in it, lit it on fire and lit a cigarette off it while flicking off my boss. How was your night??
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
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