and my herpes radar will keep us safe
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
Tequila shots with cinnamon and orange write it down before I forget
It's like you're a magic genie of bad timing
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
Due to your tardiness, I'm saving you my tab
How could she say that about my foreskin when she hasn't even seen all the cool stuff I can do with it?
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
Just don't have sex while watching Home Alone. It will ruin Christmas for you.
Whiskey. Because sometimes it's fun to have your hands go numb.
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
Theres just something about today that says lets get drunk, dont you think?
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
...okay, you can't just say 'masturbating llama' and not explain yourself
Randomize
