help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
He tugged on my tampon string and said 'there's a snake in my boot'. Needless to say he called me Woody and quoted Toy Story the rest of the night.
Now I have to picture Dave Letterman having sex with all these women. Im the real victim.
Puked in a cab. Passed out on my floor an my mom put a blanket over me. Home by 1045. I won shitshow trophy last night.
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
I wish men found my impeccable aim when spitting into the sink attractive.
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
They just keep looking funny at me. No one has attempted to tell me that I don't make sense though so maybe they're all way more high than I am.
I know I come to this conclusion on a fairly regular basis but I really do need a babysitter
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
He just said Bill Nye is just a dude. If I ever considered sleeping with him, I never will now.
Just a typical Friday. Dinner, drinks, doing lines with a member of Congress
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