are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
nutella sex= disaster
I save people's lives for a living, but I want to ruin his marriage.
I fell asleep with my vibrator still in me. I am the Queen of Sad Masturbation.
you know what would be perfect? if you flew in on a horse/cat holding taco bell and then you swooped me up and took me to disney world and it was magical
The last time I've felt a woman's touch, the twin towers were compromised. You can wait like one week
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
Haha no we did it on his bed. Then rolled off into the bean bag. It was a strangely athletic performance on my behalf.
You threw up in your own shoe then wore it home
you licked my face then when I finally got you to the bathroom, mid puke you said you liked the taste of my foundation.....you weren't drunk at all....
I was stuffing my vagina with gummy bears last night having him eat them out of me. Team Haribo for the win!
Turns out he's just a recently divorced IT guy. Not a wizard.
He was a foot taller than me and my hands were bigger than his, it's called Pity head
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