Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
I wish I could tape me & him having sex. Not for pornographic reasons, just for comic relief.
in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
dude.. you lit a cigarette on the bus and told the driver it was okay because you were fire marshall of your boy scout troop
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
Hypothetical Question: Would you take a cougar bullet for me?
So apparently nutella and chocolate body paint aren't actually the same thing.
Proudest moment of my life. Just watched a guy walk into the side of a car because I winked at him. Love these yoga pants and my hair. Fuck yes. His mouth was hanging open.
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
I was just informed that I asked for a glass of wine at the police station
I'm sure it would have gone very well with the cigarette you lit there.
What??! Dude I'm not having you barging in at like 2 am smelling of cigarettes and disappointment to sleep on my couch and then have an awkward morning with my wife while I'm at work.
Touché sir
Randomize
