I like daylight savings. I don't care if it's 4 oclock it's not daydrinking if it's dark out
seek help.
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
Her pussy was so beautiful. That's what I'LL miss the most. Not the omelets. You're the roommate, obviously our priorities on this situation are vastly different.
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
Though my hair looks fantastic i will unfortunately have to turn down your 4am sex offer
well don't blame me. sometimes vibrators go missing and people get angry. these things happen
Hey! I need booze. And penises. And a lot of mistakes that I will regret in the morning.
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
You're lucky I just like fucking you because you would really suck at being a boyfriend.
Randomize