i have a girlfriend
if you're drunk do you have a girlfriend?
no
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
When you start quoting save the last dance you need to stop drinking
I'm at about main and main street
Wait, is this the kid that tried catching a bat in your backyard with a flashlight and a ball of tin foil?
It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
I just had a dream that I was pulling you around downtown on a sled, from bar to bar. Dear lord if we start that there's no hope for us
How can I explain how nice he is to you? ...like, I'm going to have to have my world famous why being a douche is sexy talk.
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
Do you remember doing synchronized hip thrusts to Michael Jackson? Probably one of my favorite parts of the night
I don't remember his name. I had whataburger on my mind and in my hands so I wasnt really listening
you hit your head on the sneeze guard and passed out at Pizza Hut they called the police
He sent me a snap with the dog tongue filter. I might have to bench him.
if anyone breaks out the olive oil & slip n slide, text me 911.
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