Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
He jizzed my face. I had to ask for a washcloth. He ran his underwear under the water and handed them to me. Not so romantic.
I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
He's like the houdini of condoms. I never even realized he put one on before we fucked. he's magical.
Did you rob me and blame it on the strippers?
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
You know Im horny if Im walking around in my lingerie and sex robe. It's my field of dreams mentality. If I wear it, he will come.
I SHIT YOU NOT a mailman helped me leave without waking him up.
Honestly I'm not even that excited to see my boyfriend. I'm more excited to see his penis. His penis inside of me.
You looked at me, said I was a nice guy. Then you drunkenly climbed on top of me and said you liked me and wanted me.
I just masturbated in the tanning bed stoned. Best decision of my life
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
I've had your balls on my face a bunch of times so the least you could do is buy a girl some dinner.
Randomize
