i'm signing you up for texting rehab
hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
dude i need help, im throwing up blood.
no youre not, you just drank a pitcher of red koolaid trying to sober up.
oh, so thats why my junks red.
wow. cant help you there...
i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
I'm drinking red wine & feeding anchovies to the dog. I'm really not picky about what kinda of company I'm in.
OK WHO CHANGED MY RING TONE TO LADY AND THE TRAMP AND CHANGED EVERY CONTACT IN MY PHONE TO 'SOME GUY I FUCKED'?
I'm stoned entirely off resin. Licking my blankets. Merry Christmas. Jesus died for our sins. Yay Jesus. I love you.
Bruce the cab driver wants to take me on a date to see Taken 2
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
If I had an Australian accent I'd be unstoppable. Teach me how you talk
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
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