Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
reason #14 for loving my boobs...just got out of a 40mph over the limit speeding ticket thru a work zone. i dont think the cop knew i even had a face
debating whether or not to save the package from my first plan b pill. it would be a nice addition to any baby book.
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
I'm not so good at organized events that don't revolve around whiskey or playgrounds.
This is literally engraved into my seat "Need crack?" And then there's a number. This isn't real.
A nap. You broke your hand napping in Vegas.
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
I don't think I've ever had this many people offer me blow before. 3 o'clock on a Thursday. I keep good company.
So glad I can hide money in my wallet and drunk me is too stupid to find it. Hangover sushi ftw.
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
Randomize
